Thursday-Carman the nurse just left and when she first got here her first comment was, He looks good. It threw me at first so I told her I felt like maybe the cancer should be checked to see if it’s gone. She corrected herself and said I’m sorry that’s not what she meant, she meant that the pain is being better managed and his stress level has gone down so that is how he is doing better. 
She talks about the highway of life and how the fast lane is us now, the middle lane is as we get older or an illness may start, the slow lane is the lane Kent is on and maybe he will be there for a couple of weeks, she even said he could go three now, but at that point we are still looking at the exit sign and he will be pulling off. I keep thinking I’m getting better at handling what will be happening and for the most part I think my whole family really are all doing pretty good. The kids didn't come last night the first night in days (Wednesday) and it seems so quiet, Michelle said her kids wanted to know why they couldn't come, I’m so glad the grandkids love to be around us. 
We started Kent on a sleeping pill last night and we got a full seven hours sleep without any getting up. I remember those nights with my kids when they were small and didn't do well then with no sleep so I can see how important it is for Kent to be able to get a good night with out waking up. He started to stir a little after five but went back to sleep, I couldn't. I went out on the deck and watched the sun come up, watched Chad change the wheel lines, watched all the birds chasing each other around, what a wonderful time to start a day. The funny part is I’m not an early morning person yet every time I have been up for these things I have loved the time. I truly think that early morning is Gods time to show us what is truly important in this life. I had so many things going through my head to put on this blog, but my mind just seems to loose thought as fast as they come.
She talks about the highway of life and how the fast lane is us now, the middle lane is as we get older or an illness may start, the slow lane is the lane Kent is on and maybe he will be there for a couple of weeks, she even said he could go three now, but at that point we are still looking at the exit sign and he will be pulling off. I keep thinking I’m getting better at handling what will be happening and for the most part I think my whole family really are all doing pretty good. The kids didn't come last night the first night in days (Wednesday) and it seems so quiet, Michelle said her kids wanted to know why they couldn't come, I’m so glad the grandkids love to be around us. We started Kent on a sleeping pill last night and we got a full seven hours sleep without any getting up. I remember those nights with my kids when they were small and didn't do well then with no sleep so I can see how important it is for Kent to be able to get a good night with out waking up. He started to stir a little after five but went back to sleep, I couldn't. I went out on the deck and watched the sun come up, watched Chad change the wheel lines, watched all the birds chasing each other around, what a wonderful time to start a day. The funny part is I’m not an early morning person yet every time I have been up for these things I have loved the time. I truly think that early morning is Gods time to show us what is truly important in this life. I had so many things going through my head to put on this blog, but my mind just seems to loose thought as fast as they come. I came back in and Kent was trying to get up, he hates the diaper so I’ve decided to take it off and try the bed pan tell the device they are bringing gets here. As I was cleaning him up he kept staring at me, I told him I loved him and he said I’ve always loved you more, well there went my strong period and the tears started to fall. We have had more treasured times in the last four years than we had the whole 37 years we have been married. Shows me now how we really do take advantage of the ones we love. We always think they will be there, they will put up with what ever we dish out, if your reading this give your loved ones and extra hug and kiss today cause they may not be there tomorrow.
The kids all came over tonight and Cody and Chad worked on the deck, we ate and the girls had to go to play practice with part of the kids. We also had the Barrus's show up they flew in from Alaska last night and are headed to see their son graduate down in Manti. They’re going to come back on Sunday then Frank will fly home and Barbara will go to see her family in Wyoming.
We also had Mel and Julie Blanie stop in to see Kent, Julie is fighting cancer and last Monday while she was having treatment Mel had a heart attack and was in same hospital. He had a stint put in. It was nice to see all of them. We sure to pray that everything turns out o.k. with them. Kent’s two brothers Lorin and Glade will be here tomorrow and Marva his youngest sister will be driving in on Sunday from Denver, I just hope he is able to talk to them. When Mark was here he didn't say anything, and tonight Frank asked if he could hear him. I think he can hear but the meds keep his body so relaxed and free from pain that he just listens to everyone.
The kids all came over tonight and Cody and Chad worked on the deck, we ate and the girls had to go to play practice with part of the kids. We also had the Barrus's show up they flew in from Alaska last night and are headed to see their son graduate down in Manti. They’re going to come back on Sunday then Frank will fly home and Barbara will go to see her family in Wyoming.We also had Mel and Julie Blanie stop in to see Kent, Julie is fighting cancer and last Monday while she was having treatment Mel had a heart attack and was in same hospital. He had a stint put in. It was nice to see all of them. We sure to pray that everything turns out o.k. with them. Kent’s two brothers Lorin and Glade will be here tomorrow and Marva his youngest sister will be driving in on Sunday from Denver, I just hope he is able to talk to them. When Mark was here he didn't say anything, and tonight Frank asked if he could hear him. I think he can hear but the meds keep his body so relaxed and free from pain that he just listens to everyone.Tammy, Skyler and Cambrelle are going to sing Kent’s favorite song HOMEWARD BOUND by Marta Keen and they brought the music and tried to sing it for me. Michelle can’t even be in the room before she falls apart. Skyler couldn’t keep it together and when he fell apart Cake was next, she has such an amazing voice. Well Tam was trying hard but she went down also and Cayden followed his mom. It ended up being a huge crying mess. I don’t know how we are going to have a funeral when none of us can hold it together. I want our family to do the music and talks, I know Kent would want that also.
It’s Friday morning now and I’m sitting here waiting for the sun to come up again and listening to each breath that Kent is taking. We made it seven hours again with no interruptions in sleep, in fact I’m the one waking up and waiting for some sign that he needs something. The little wrinkle in his face tells me it’s time for more meds. The early mornings are pretty much the only time that Kent is awake for very long. He is still trying to get up and can pull himself up to sit so I had them put a pull bar at the head of his bed. He has always been a very strong person in body and mind so it’s hard to even imagine what is going through his head.
We thank all of you for your comments, e-mails, calls and prayers. I better get back to the tasks of the day. Number one priority is Kent.
Shirley
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